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Only people who earn a lot of money can be successful пример (Сочинения ЕГЭ английский язык)

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Many people believe that a person who earns a lot is successful, while others claim that having money does not mean being happy and satisfied with life.

In my opinion, there are plenty of things that make people happy, so it is not about having a well-paid job because being rich does not necessarily mean being successful. Firstly, you should be satisfied with your profession, even if you cannot earn a lot in this position. In any other case, you will be unhappy with the things you do day by day. Secondly, people who have a big salary usually spend all their time doing stuff related to their business. It means that they do not have enough time to have fun with their friends. For example, people who do not pay so much attention to their earnings work less than those who care about it much because a successful career requires hard work.

However, not all people are ready to share my point of view. They claim that if you have a lot of money, you can afford everything you might want.

For example, you can travel a lot or buy expensive clothes. For them, it means total happiness and success in life. Additionally, they think that only wealthy people can build a successful career that helps their dreams come true.

I cannot fully agree with the statement above. To begin with, even if a person can afford expensive goods, it does not mean that he or she is successful because there are things that people cannot buy - love and health. In my view, if a person can afford everything, as time goes by, he also will not be satisfied because he had already seen everything he could dream of. Then such people understand that there is something else in life besides money.

To sum up, the question of whether being successful means having a lot of money will always be controversial. I believe that it is more important to have true friends and good health.

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К1 (решение коммуникативной задачи) – 1 балл

1) К сожалению, автор значительно превысил допустимый объём сочинения – в тексте насчитывается 337 слов при разрешённых 275. В соответствии с правилами, проверяется только часть работы до слов I cannot fully agree with the statement above включительно.

2) Превышение объёма приводит к тому, что контраргументация и заключение не попадают в оцениваемую часть сочинения и считаются фактически отсутствующими.

К2 (организация текста) – 3 балла

Текст организован верно.

К3 (лексика) – 3 балла

Серьёзных отклонений от лексических норм не отмечено.

К4 (грамматика) – 3 балла

For them, it meansTo them, it means [Рекомендуется заменить предлог].

К5 (орфография и пунктуация) – 2 балла

Нарушений правил орфографии и пунктуации нет.

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